Yes to this. I know to well. It has eased now for me, significantly because I go with it and towards it rather than resisting. My relationship to the dark night shifted and as w all things a shift in perspective can be beautifully alchemical
Thanks Jane. I do find I have to 'suffer' the agonies for a while before they calm down and I can just go with them - but it is always a surprisingly restful feeling when that finally happens! 'Alchemical' describes it very well, I think; I'm even tempted to go so far as to say 'initiatory'. Glad you have found some ease with this yourself.
Hi Gwyn. What you describe in this article - letting your concerns wash over you rather than wrestling with them - sounds a lot like mindfulness. Is this a technique that you've ever tried?
I've been practising mindfulness and meditation for a number of years as techniques to help me combat anxiety and insomnia. Neither technique is 'easy' but with a bit of practice, both can be effective in dealing with anxiety and insomnia. At least they have helped me.
I was also very interested to read that you are worrying about romantic involvement. Personally, following my divorce 7 years ago and a number of years of unsuccessful and unrewarding internet dating, I have accepted that my days of romance are over. In some ways this acceptance has helped me to feel less aggrieved, but it has also contributed to a growing fear of potential future loneliness. One worry replaces another! I'm not sure what the answer is, but a problem shared is.... a problem shared.
I really enjoy reading what you write hear, so many thanks for that. Take care.
Thanks for this, Steve. I have tried meditation, but it's not something I've managed to stick with. I find I get something similar from my walks in the country, so that may be why I was so distraught for not having got out there for a month!
In terms of future loneliness, yes, I can see how that is not something to be dismissed. I'm sure you are as aware as I am of all the advice about joining clubs etc!!! (Personally, I can't bear the thought of internet dating, but I don't rule it out for the future.) But these things are also said to turn up when we least expect them, so maybe don't give up hope just yet?
How have you been? I'm glad to see that you are getting more chances to exhibit your art. That must be very exciting.
I wanted to return to our discussion about meditation. I've recently started Tai Chi classes and I think it combines meditation and movement in a way that might be similar to what you experience when you go walking.
It's a good alternative to walking for someone like me who has had a hip replacement (and find it difficult to walk any distance unless there is a good pub at the end of the walk!).
Have you ever tried Tai Chi?
Anyway, I hope your artistic endeavours go from strength to strength. My son is starting a performance degree at the Welsh Royal College of Music in September. Perhaps I'll see you in South Wales?
Hi Steve, it's lovely to hear from you again! I'm really interested in your explorations with Tai Chi. I have tried Qi Gong, which I think is a variant of it, but I couldn't get to grips with it very well, and have settled better into yoga. But walking, definitely, has that tinge of meditation to it that I think is often underappreciated. I too am noticing a joint stiffness that comes with older age, although I have so far managed to avoid actual surgery. I hope you're well, regardless!
Let me know if/when you are next in South Wales, and it would be great to meet up. Cardiff is ~10 minutes away from Newport by train, so a very easy trip 🙂
Yes to this. I know to well. It has eased now for me, significantly because I go with it and towards it rather than resisting. My relationship to the dark night shifted and as w all things a shift in perspective can be beautifully alchemical
Thanks Jane. I do find I have to 'suffer' the agonies for a while before they calm down and I can just go with them - but it is always a surprisingly restful feeling when that finally happens! 'Alchemical' describes it very well, I think; I'm even tempted to go so far as to say 'initiatory'. Glad you have found some ease with this yourself.
Hi Gwyn. What you describe in this article - letting your concerns wash over you rather than wrestling with them - sounds a lot like mindfulness. Is this a technique that you've ever tried?
I've been practising mindfulness and meditation for a number of years as techniques to help me combat anxiety and insomnia. Neither technique is 'easy' but with a bit of practice, both can be effective in dealing with anxiety and insomnia. At least they have helped me.
I was also very interested to read that you are worrying about romantic involvement. Personally, following my divorce 7 years ago and a number of years of unsuccessful and unrewarding internet dating, I have accepted that my days of romance are over. In some ways this acceptance has helped me to feel less aggrieved, but it has also contributed to a growing fear of potential future loneliness. One worry replaces another! I'm not sure what the answer is, but a problem shared is.... a problem shared.
I really enjoy reading what you write hear, so many thanks for that. Take care.
Steve
Thanks for this, Steve. I have tried meditation, but it's not something I've managed to stick with. I find I get something similar from my walks in the country, so that may be why I was so distraught for not having got out there for a month!
In terms of future loneliness, yes, I can see how that is not something to be dismissed. I'm sure you are as aware as I am of all the advice about joining clubs etc!!! (Personally, I can't bear the thought of internet dating, but I don't rule it out for the future.) But these things are also said to turn up when we least expect them, so maybe don't give up hope just yet?
Hi Gwyn,
How have you been? I'm glad to see that you are getting more chances to exhibit your art. That must be very exciting.
I wanted to return to our discussion about meditation. I've recently started Tai Chi classes and I think it combines meditation and movement in a way that might be similar to what you experience when you go walking.
It's a good alternative to walking for someone like me who has had a hip replacement (and find it difficult to walk any distance unless there is a good pub at the end of the walk!).
Have you ever tried Tai Chi?
Anyway, I hope your artistic endeavours go from strength to strength. My son is starting a performance degree at the Welsh Royal College of Music in September. Perhaps I'll see you in South Wales?
Steve
Hi Steve, it's lovely to hear from you again! I'm really interested in your explorations with Tai Chi. I have tried Qi Gong, which I think is a variant of it, but I couldn't get to grips with it very well, and have settled better into yoga. But walking, definitely, has that tinge of meditation to it that I think is often underappreciated. I too am noticing a joint stiffness that comes with older age, although I have so far managed to avoid actual surgery. I hope you're well, regardless!
Let me know if/when you are next in South Wales, and it would be great to meet up. Cardiff is ~10 minutes away from Newport by train, so a very easy trip 🙂